After I had Sweetpea there was a feeling of renewal; of starting over.
I thought perhaps after bringing home Bouncy I might have a similar feeling.
Instead I feel overwhelmed pretty much on a daily basis. I can't keep up with everything...at least not to my own satisfaction.
I would like very much to be like the newest feline member of our family, Rosie, (that's her above) and be able to chase a bit of fluff and feel absolutely content.
I keep reading things about finding my joy and strength in Jesus Christ by keeping myself utterly focused on Him. I get it. I've had times in my life when I've done that. I have verses hidden in my heart to help me with that.
You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You.
Because his mind is stayed on You.
Be still and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.
I am trying to do that now. But (you knew the 'but' was coming right?), I am having a hard time.
I'm exhausted for one thing...constant intense parenting will do that to you. And when you adopt...you sign on for constant intense parenting. And not just your adopted child. Our bio kids need extra parenting too.
If I weren't able to remind myself that this is all God's plan. If He had not blessed me recently with seeing what the adoption road looks like nine months down the road I think I would huddle in my bathtub in a puddle of tears.
I am so grateful that He has allowed me to see what things look like as time goes on.
I am so grateful for promises like this.
The LORD of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.